It’s a different world than the age of “be seen and not heard” or even “respect your elders”. I was so hoping to capitalize on those beliefs as I entered the adult world, especially the one about “do as I say, not as I do”. As a child, I envisioned a world where I would get to boss children around, make them get things for me, and yell at them for leaving their shoes in the doorway even though mine were right there too. Ah – what a world that was going to be.
It never arrived. I’m guessing my parents didn’t experience their lives from my childhood vantage point either. Being an adult does not bring with it a “get out of responsibility” card – quite the opposite. Yet how do children view the authority of adults today? Are we seen as dictators, playmates, encouragers? If children were to see adults for what we desire to be, they would be ever so pleased with their current role of “child”, for it seems most adults just want children to learn what they need to learn in order to be the best they can be. That doesn’t seem so hard, does it?
Take a moment today to let your children know that you trust who they are and what they are becoming. They are a “work in progress” – and aren’t we all! Along with the statements to “get up”, “clean up”, and “wise up” add a liberal dose of encouragement. “You’re getting it!” “It’s clear you’re trying to figure things out” or “Sometimes it’s hard at first. You have it in you to master this.”
There is a reason that all the phrases of the past are losing their luster. They didn’t do much to honor the process of growth. We can let our children know that every day is an opportunity to try again. They have time to learn – that’s what childhood is all about.